I knew the Titanic had already hit the iceberg when I boarded her at Stony this morning!
Captain Lombardi had already abandoned ship (after he said he would be there). What is with these Italian sea captains?
The vessel further listed as “lil Dave” mumbled incoherently about visiting Davy Jones’ Locker, and slipped quietly over the side. First Mate Jones was next. “I have to save my Grandkids ” as he slipped away on his old blue lifeboat with “Walcott Mills” barely readable on the rusted stern. (He didn’t want to get any salt water spray on the new orange lifeboat!)
The “Ancient Navigator” said “Ayyy Maties its a wee bit too cold for my likin’, and I thinks we should abandon and take our chances on the trolly sea and perchance find the Intermediate Islands”
Up at the bow were huddled seaman Dave and bosun Pat (with someone I swear looked like Celine Dion) singing “My Heart Will Go On”!!!
The ships pursor and photomate, Bruce, rolled his eyes and proclaimed, “If ’tis going to take all day ta sink this foundering bucket, I do na have the stumic fer it”!!
As I wished for the days when ships were made of wood and men were made of steel, I could see that the writing was on the bulkhead and there was no saving this old girl. I pulled my Noreaster up around my neck and dove into the Gravel Sea. I bobbed along on the rough seas near the straits of Oryan and thru the maelstrom at the Cape of Markwood. A following sea greeted me on the run down the coast of Drahner. Hallucinating now, I thought I spied a monastery in the misty scud coming from the distance! And I sang the words, “Oh hear us when we cry to thee, for those in peril on the sea.”
My plea was answered as a huge tanker with the name Starbucks appeared and took me aboard.
(Must have been a foreign-registery vessel, as they said such things as “grande mocha latte”, etc.)
Anyway I’m safe at home and feeling humble to have made it through this harrowing day.
As a form of pennance and foreshadowing of what days like today might bring, I am now down in my engine room, one deck below the galley, preparing my S.A.R.B. for the coming season …
In the distance I hear “Taps” being played on a bright shiny bugle!